Here's How It Works.....

Or, How To Annihilate Your Sense of Self Confidence In 9 Easy Steps. Step 1: spend two days preparing a monologue for an audition. Step 2: audition. Step 3: get phone call from producer - 'we really, REALLY liked you, you did a great audition, but unfortunately, you know, because of the other casting, we couldn't find a place for you this time. BUT you were good!. And we aren't just saying that! We have other shows!' click. [this means I look too young for the older parts, too old for the younger parts, too short, too skinny, too cute, too something to fit in] Step 4: allow 10 minutes of self pity (give or take a week or so) and then move on. Step 5: producers phone again - 'hey listen, one of the other actresses MAY drop out, and there MIGHT be possibly a part opening up, would you still be interested? We'll call you back.' Step 6: wait two days. Step 7: producers phone AGAIN - 'Hey listen, it looks like the other actress is going to be able to do the show. [OF COURSE SHE IS!] Wanna do props for us instead?' [Hmm, not really, but okay, because I want to look like I can handle the rejection maturely.] Step 8: slowly lose hope of ever performing again. Step 9: repeat, ad nauseum.....